i forget to mention in my previous post.
that it isnt a emo post, or that i write it cos i was feeling upset.
in fact i write it in high spirits.
feeling happy and peaceful.
lol.

because these issues have happened before.
and i have deal with it in a typical xinyi way.
and i have move on too.

like the priority thing, it doesnt hurt me that much anymore.
i still make the same mistake then and now.
but then there will never be any equality in friendship.
and it isnt about who puts in more.
its about how this friendship works out.
i may be willing to do something for a friend that she wont do for me, and yet she will be willing to do something for me that i wont do for her.
so its not equal.
and will never be.
but then, its okay and perfectly normal.
i am happy that i am able to do somethings for my friends.
because i believe in making use of who i am.


there are somethings that will never change.
like who i am, how i am, what i am.
despite the fact that all the times i told myself to change.
unless it is something that will cause others hurt, then i would change it no matter how hard it is.

even though it might sound ridiculously stupid, i am thoroughly happy in the fact that every night i sleep, i feel totally at peace with myself.
no guilt conscious or whatsoever.
no niggling thought.

actually despite the fact that i complained, grumbled, whined and rant,
if i have another choice or chance to do it again,
i would do the same thing all over and again.

i have listened to many people,
different advices.
and those are totally extreme ones on the two ends.
i gladly take some, leave some.
like i said, if i change to be someone i am not, then i wouldnt be the same person again.
things wouldnt be the same, and friendships wouldnt be the same again.

and if i wasnt the same person anymore, would you interact with me in the same way?
i doubt so.
LOL.

so yes, i am HAPPY (:


i am sick.
lol
again.
fever coming back again and again.
today was much much better.
lucky.
if not i would have to lie in bed for dontknowhowmany days.
lol.
i need to take more vit C.
got to go stock up on that.

i finally settled on many stuff.
i ordered my catering and cake.
and the cake is dammmmmmnnnn pwreeetty.
HAHA.
i super like.

yay.
no more things to do.

shall go sleep somemore.
haha.
wohooo. (: