When u cares about someone, and then u gt accused that you dont look like you care,
it hurts.
it seriously makes you wonder what you are doing. why u are doing, when it seems like it is for nothing
it will go to : you dont look like u care."
you wonder why u even bother to care, cos afterall people are not going to see the way you care.
it hurts, freakingly even when people say it without thinking how much hurt that few words actually wields
they dont mean to hurt
btu still, it makes u kinda fel useless
it makes you wonder is its true, that u really dont care about the people ard u,
and you are just lying to urself that u care.
it makes one wonder if this is what everyone thinks, but dont want to say it out
it makes me feel like one big bitch.
..............................................................
next time, dont bother asking me go out because i wont go.
when that sentence came out, it strucks at the most painful part
it kinda proves the point that i am insignificant.
so that sentence really adds on to the realisation of mine that i am really insignificant.
afterall, "dont bother asking me out" means to me that i am someone that dont mean anything
and can do with or without.
i know people say this without meaning any hurt or any malice. they just say it without thinking how much hurt that sentence may bring
or it maybe only i who am being too sensitive
so yeah, dont ask mee to go next time, but i will appreciate it if u dont tell me that u actually dont bother to ask me, cos words still hurts.
you kinda supported what i have been feeling these dew days
that i am really insignificant. even when u dont mean it
i like to be alone these few days
because i wont get too sensitive over what people may say
and i wont go ard hurting anyone with my really depressing mood.
i had effectively turn into a loner.
thanks claud for ur msg this morning
u gave me hope and warmth.
thanks for ur care.*smooch*
i am easily hurt these days
because of the events before during after promos
i wish i can erase all the unhappy events
i wish i can tell myself to be happy
i wish i dont have to pretend everything is fine when my world is spiralling down.
i wish i have the rights to say no.
i wish i am 7 years old again.
i wish and hope i mean something to people ard me , if its only a tiny bit to people.
i wish i wake up tmr feeling happy.

sometimes i just have to keep lying to myself..
i am ranting but i tink i have the right to do so.
:((
i am ranting and i know i sound so childish so evil so........
forgive me if i sound like one big bitch...